✘ appointments

[imatreenow]

For those moments when we're in between posts and need to thread something out.

Please note the date and the type of post - action, written, or voice.

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[falenandawn]

But that belief lays with you and you alone in this place. It might not be easy to accept, but surely you understand that people here are not of the same views as those of your world?

I'm not saying it is simple to let go of.... The past is difficult to cut away, and it would doubtlessly be difficult after living your life in such a way. But you have a chance to live your life differently then you have until now, if you want to try. You have a chance to rise above those beliefs.

[imatreenow]

That chance is nothing but an illusion...it's a choice I don't have. I hate humans. I will never forgive them. ...I don't want to forgive them. [He doesn't want to admit that he was in the wrong. He doesn't want to acknowledge that he spent all those years hating and decaying for nothing, even though he's already aware of how painfully true that might be.] You speak of impossibilities. I can't believe that humans are capable of change, not anymore.

[It's supposed to be a definitive statement, but his tone quietly betrays the confusion that boils underneath the surface. In the time he's been here, living in a village of humans as he could only dream of doing long ago, nobody has targeted him for being what he is. The fear, disgust, and contempt he expects are conspicuously absent even when he makes plain his non-humanness. None of it makes sense. His old beliefs are slowly becoming less sturdy, but he doesn't know what else to cling to.]

You could never understand how difficult it was for me to learn to trust Sayo. She was kind, but I couldn't let myself believe it was real. Every day I waited for it all to fall apart and reveal the truth: she would realize she had no reason to care about me, because she's a human and I'm not. I thought that eventually she would reject me and abandon me.