imatreenow | ✘ appointments

Mmm...

Sometimes, people hurt each other, for different reasons: family, friends, people you don't really know—they can hurt you, or you them, whether accidental or intentional.

What you've done in the past, though... it doesn't matter to me. I forgave it a long time ago. You just did... what you've learned to do. I can't hate you for that, not at all.

Forgiveness is another thing I cannot understand... [Sometimes, he wishes he could... But he's drifted along for this long, hating every human he possibly can, regardless of whether they were even alive when his sister was killed, or even if they don't originate from the same world. If he hasn't learned forgiveness by now, he never will.

...Ah, he may as well take a seat while he waits. He fixes his eyes straight ahead, rather than looking at her.]

Most have faulted me for thinking the way I do.

[She sits down, too, across from him. Maybe because it may be the last time she can, in a house, like this. She's not sure, anymore.]

Forgiveness can be a very powerful thing. Sometimes, it makes a lot of difference, and sometimes, it's for some sort of piece of mind... But it's not something a person has to offer anyone. That's entirely up to them. It's the person who was hurt's right, and theirs alone.

[She leans back.]

You've had a hard life, I imagine. I can't fault you at all for how you feel.

...

[A pause.]

The... truth is, I also want to forgive as often as I can in the hopes that... the people from home may one day forgive me.

Edited 2012-01-25 07:40 (UTC)

[And just like that, she absolves him of everything. Her view of the world is completely different from his, but she doesn't deny that his is valid. She doesn't blame him for the weakness pooled in his heart. He had always thought that no one could possibly understand unless they had been through the same, but...

Now she's right in his line of vision, but he doesn't look away.]

...Forgive you of what? [this is part incredulity, part curiosity. The question is out before he can stop himself.]

[She clenches the sleeve of her kimono.]

Of forgetting them... even though they'd all been there for me. For not being able to save those precious memories, of my mother and father... of who may have been in my life... of my husband...

I hope that someday, I can earn forgiveness for that.

[She knows it was out of her control. But... But to forget people who have safeguarded you for so long... The man and woman who created her, or the man who helped bring Kaji into the world, or the sibling or uncle or aunt she never realized she had.

She wishes she could fix it all, even if wishing didn't mean much.]

[She laughs--the sheepish kind of laugh that feels unnatural, but can't be helped.]

But all that's sort of depressing, isn't it? I'll just have to see where life takes me when I return home someday, I suppose. Until then, I've been trying to keep my life here as good as I can make it...

And remember as many people as I can!

[Her husband. A spark of anger. She shouldn't have to seek forgiveness from someone who betrayed her, nor does such traitorous swine deserve forgiveness from her. ...He wonders if she would forgive even that, if she knew. Even she has to have her limits... He almost wants to tell her, but he knows he shouldn't.]

Humans have committed sins far worse than forgetting others. [Especially when she had no control over it. This is his own way of telling her that the people in her life, the ones who mattered, would surely forgive her.]

[She catches onto that fact quickly enough.]

... Thank you. For dealing with me and everything. [a laugh] I hope I didn't give you too much grief while you were here. I know it's a pretty... strange living environment.

[The sticky notes, they're a bit much, aren't they. `_`]

But I hope it's been an alright place for you to rest. Do you two need any help moving things over?

[It's like he suddenly realizes that this is a normal conversation, and he's having it with a human. Frightening and strange, how he can halfway forget in softly suspended moments. His deeply-ingrained doubts pull him back into his shell a little more; he can only go so far in one day. Back to simple answers, but his voice is softened.]

...Yes, it was alright. [If by that, they mean it was more than he could have ever imagined.]

We should be fine. [He didn't have too much here - clothes and things like that could be packed easily. And even without the use of his hands, he could carry a little on his shoulders.]

Good.

[She nods. This is good.]

Go ahead and help Martel-san, then, so we don't keep her waiting too long.

[He nods, thinking Martel should be just about done and ready to go. This is where he should start hoisting himself out of his seat, but he hesitates. Suddenly, he wonders when he will ever see Sayo again, once he walks out the door with his sister. For a fleeting moment of folded-up loneliness, he's struck with the clawing impulse to tell her about the anonymously written messages. Had she figured it out? Would she remember?

The fledgling words die in the back of his throat. He seals his mouth shut. He isn't ready to let her connect the pieces of himself that he's already shared.

He stands to go to his sister, walking down the hall to the room that had been his and leaving everything unfinished.]

Edited 2012-01-31 08:07 (UTC)

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